|
I haven't posted anything in a really long time so I just kinda of wanted to update on what going in my life. I am still trying to finish school I have 12 credits to go which hopefully can be spread out over two semsters. Who the hell knows. I am tired and can't wait to graduate. I am on the fence about moving out of florida. I want to see what life hands me before I make that move. I broke up with Rob when I came back from the DR and we are still friends. It was for the best. I got tired coming in second all the time. I hope the next guy I get with can make time for me. I am hopefully getting a car by the end of this month and I can't freaking believe it. I still don't trust my dad I hope he doesn't let me down.
I miss Miami and I am freaking bored in Boca. No one comes to visit me expect for Chino. I am going home for Thanksgiving hopefully I can reconnect with some old friends. I got a call from Gabor and that really brought back old memories. I miss my time in Miami Dade it was kinda of like my high school experience. It's true what they say you can't go back as much as you wish you could. I still talk to a bunch of people on Myspace but nothing beats seeing everyone in person.
I never have time to write in my Journal anymore cause I am so freaking busy I feel like I never have anytime for anything any more. The only reason I am writing now is because I had a day off form school today and I can do most of my homework tomorrow. Well that all I have for now. My life is pretty boring hopefully I can get out and do something exciting.Current Mood:  contemplative |
|
I have had many best friends in my life and they have come and gone and took a part of me every time they left. There was my childhood best friend who I lost contact with after we both grew up and started two different paths. Me in school, her with the boys there was no fights or arguements it was just a general fading away of the friendship. There was my teenage friend who I thought we would be close forever but alas that changed as well. He had a choice to make and I didn't fit into the equation. So him + his family x his personal choices= me left on the outside alone. The end of this friendship hurt the most because he was the friend I thought would be in my life forever. However fate has brought us together but our friendship will never be the same and he thinks it's because I haven't forgiven him but truth be told he has to find a way to carve out a new niche in my life because I am not that girl he remembers any more. There is my other teenage best friend who I never really have had a chance to know the true her. I love her but it hurts that she doesn't trust me to give me part of her self. I am still friends with her but I don't know know her. There is the girl who is afraid to be on her own I worry about her the most because she can't see the strength she has inside and no matter what I tell her she doesn't know her own power. I pray for her when I can and I ask god to make her see who she is.
Now I come to the friends who are like family. There is the boy who has my back 150% and I know he will do everything in his power to help me. If I am sad he makes me laugh and he lets me see the real him which not many get to. I thank God that he is in my life and I ask him to keep him safe and in my life forever. The reason I call him familia is because he is like a brother to me and I would do anything for him. There is the big sister I have always wanted and needed. She takes care of me and help me when I need it. She tells me things I need to hear and she makes it in a way that doesn't make me pissed off. I want to be in her life just so I can see where the future takes me and her. Then there's the girl who really is my ride or die chick. I know if I get into some mess she sitting right beside me in the jail cell saying "Hey at least they feed us three times a day". She is my sister from another mother. I ask God to keep her in my life because I want to see where he crazy ass end's up. lol
I didn't metion names because if I wrote about you believe me you know who you are.Current Mood: contemplative |
|
|
Jan. 29th, 2006 @ 01:43 pm
|
|---|
|
I've been on this emotional rollercoaster all week. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should break up with Rob or not. I feel like he doesn't want to be with me and like I have to force him to get any of his time. Ever since we came back from break all we do is argue and I've cried more in this past month then I have in this past year, if you don't count sad movies. I am tired of feeling like I am alone all the time. I'm not some high maintance girl that need s her boyfriend under thm all the time but I mean I just want one night a week. I mean I am lucky if I get that. I know he really busy but what am I supposed to do. Hole up in some hole until he is ready to spend time with me.I asked him to take Valentine's Day off from his night job so we can spend it together. Nothing big just enjoying our time together. I didn't ask for flowers, candy or any of that other stuff most girls get on V-day and he told me that he couldn't. So now instead of spending it with him. I will be spending it with my roomates watching chick flicks and crying. It's not fair. I don't want to feel this way but I don't want to break up with him but I tired of feel lonely, unwanted, and horny. I didn't want to be in a fucking relationship and of course like fucking idiot I feel into one. I wrote this because I needed to vent I just hope that I don't get any "I told you so".Current Mood:  lonely |
|
I had a pretty great Christmas. I spent it with my family and my love one's. We had a bomb ass dinner and we had fun. The only down side was that Aunt Flo decided to come to town. Damn her she always shows up at the worst time. So that means I will have take her with me to the NYC which sucks big time. Anyways back to Christmas this had to be the best one in a long time because everyone was so surprised with what they got. I got mad sponge bob stuff which is always awesome but that wasn't the best part. I like being with my family and enjoying ourselves. Joking and carry on. I know that what Christmas is about. It's not about the commercilization of the holiday because if that all you see then that sucks for you. I see as a time love and cherish your family but if you have a crappy family life of course you are going to talk shit about Christmas because you will never know the true meaning of the holiday. I been hearing all this stuff in the media and from different people about Christmas and I think people just want to have something to say. I especially love when people who don't even celebrate the holiday rag on it. You don't see me talking shit about Hannukah, Ramadan, Kwanzaa and whatever other holiday that fall at this time. So I'm going to say if you don't celebrate the holiday Keep Christmas out yo mouth.Current Mood:  aggravated |
|
Update
|
Dec. 17th, 2005 @ 10:30 pm
|
|---|
|
So I haven't update my journal in a while I just been busy as fuck with school. I did good this semester. I got an A in Rock n Roll, A B- in my crazy ass Art Appreciation class, a B in my Acting class, and the bitch from my Government class gave me a C which I'm really pissed about. All in all I kicked ass. I really excited for next semester. My classes are going to be really hard but now I am back in the swing of things. I always been a really good student it's just I tend to get sidetrack a lot.
On the guy front Rob and I have been "together together" for about 4 months now and things are going good. I just sometimes get frustrated with our situation. I guess I just have to get used to some stuff. I never really had a serious relationship and while Rob treats me well I get upset sometimes at the fact that we don't get to spend that much time together because he works so much. I know in the rational part of my brain that he needs to work but of course as much as I try to supress the irrational woman part she comes out and I can't understand why he won't quit his night job. I guess when you get in a realtionship you have to make compromise. I love him and I know all readers are probably rolling their eyes at this but I guess as much as I try love will find me. I will say this though if he leaves my life won't be over and it will hurt but I won't fall to pieces. I never want to make anyone my whole life.
I going to NYC for New years which I am so freakin excited about. I'm going to see snow for the first time. I can't wait. I think I won't be able to sleep until then. I going to have to buy some mad winter clothes cause I don't think Flip Flops is going to cut. That shit might work for Tiffany but I full blooded Carribean I got no white in me and my people are a tropical people we don't react well to the cold.
That pretty much for now. I'll try to update more now that I have a computer since I convinced my dad to give me the one from the house. Which I'm pretty sure is going to be Christmas gift from him.Current Mood:  accomplished Current Music: Mayor que Yo- Daddy Yankee, Luny Tunes, Wisin & Yandel |
| » Okay that is way creepy |
|---|
| Your Birthdate: May 4 | 
Being born on the 4th day of the month should help make you a better manager and organizer.
You may be more responsible and self-disciplined than you realize.
Sincere and honest, you are a serious and hard working individual.
Your feelings are likely to seem somewhat repressed at times.
The number 4 has something of an inhibiting effect on your ability to show and express affections, as feeling are very closely regulated and controlled.
You are apt to be much more practical, rational, and conscious of details.
There is a good deal of rigidity and stubbornness associated with the number 4. |
Sep. 28th, 2005 @ 05:14 pm
|
| » (No Subject) |
|---|
Sep. 20th, 2005 @ 06:31 pm
|
| » My update |
|---|
So everything seems to be going okay for me this semester. I got my Financial Aid back for the Fall I just have to get good grades in my classes to get it back for the spring. I am getting into the grove of my classes. I want to get really good grades get my money back so I am going to work hard to do my best. I am geting more into school. I am even trying out for a musical. I am really nervous about that because I haven't sang since high school.
The roomate situation is going oaky for right now but my friends Tiff and Stacy got some really shitty roomates. Stacy has a homophobic nazi bitch and Tiff has stuck up, spoiled princess.
Oh yeah and I finally lost my virginity just like I had planned it to happen. I lost to Rob who I totally feel comfortable with. He stopped when I told him ti hurt and everything. Now I have to admit it I think I got him sprung. He has been trying to act like my boyfriend which is okay and everything I just don't want it to become this drama filled realationship bullshit. I just like what we have. When I want to see him he comes over and when I don't he doesn't come over and he doesn't give me shit about it. I like that we laugh a lot because to me humor is a very big thing. I also like that he isn't consuming my every thought I pretty much keep him on the back burner until I am ready to talk about him.
I have to go to the DR for Christmas because my Abuela is still sick and she gave me mad guilt over the phone because I didn't come for the summer.
I still miss my bebo Simba and every day I pray to him and god because I know he can hear me in heaven. That pretty much all for now. Wish me luck on the audition. Ta Ta.
Aug. 31st, 2005 @ 12:22 pm
|
| » (No Subject) |
|---|
|
Designed by georgedorn and provided by Positronic Design.
Grab your own copy here.
Aug. 20th, 2005 @ 09:37 pm
|
| » I lost my baby |
|---|
On Friday my poodle Simba died and I feel like there is this big hole in my heart. That dog was my world. For those who know me you know how much he meant to me. I loved him so much. He died because of carelessness and I feel like if I hadn't gone away to school he would still be alive. It hurts so much and I have never felt a pain like this. It was like losing my soul mate. My baby was the most sweetest dog in the world and he never hurt anyone. I am so angry with my dad because I feel like he let my dog die. I don't have boyfriend or a husband but I had my dog the one thing that love my unconditonally and now he is gone. He died in my arms and I felt like a little part of me died too. At least I wasn't alone when all this happened Rosemary took me to Miami and stayed with me the whole time. I just know now that I can't trust my father and that is the most painfull thing of all.
Aug. 1st, 2005 @ 01:08 pm
|
| » (No Subject) |
|---|
GRYFFINDOR!
You scored 12% Slytherin, 24% Ravenclaw, 72% Gryffindor, and 16% Hufflepuff! |
You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart.
Gryffindors are known for their courage, audacity, and devotion to what is good and honest. |
 |
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
|
You scored higher than 12% on Slytherin |
|
You scored higher than 33% on Ravenclaw |
|
You scored higher than 93% on Gryffindor |
|
You scored higher than 4% on Hufflepuff |
|
Jul. 28th, 2005 @ 02:10 pm
|
| » (No Subject) |
|---|
the Idiot Savant
(34% dark, 56% spontaneous, 50% vulgar) |
your humor style:
VULGAR | SPONTANEOUS | LIGHT
You like things silly, immediate, and, above all, outrageous. Ixne on the subtle word play, more testicles on fire, please. People like you are the most likely to RECEIVE internet forwards--and also the most likely to save them in a special folder entitled 'HOLY SHIT'.
Because it's so easily appreciated, and often a little physical, your sense of humor never ceases to amuse your friends. But most realize that there's a sly intelligence and a knowing wink to your tastes. Your sense of humor could be called 'anti-pretentious'--but ironically, that definitely indicates you're smarter than most.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Johnny Knoxville - Jimmy Kimmel |
 |
My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
|
You scored higher than 11% on dark |
|
You scored higher than 77% on spontaneous |
|
You scored higher than 90% on vulgar |
|
Jul. 25th, 2005 @ 01:28 pm
|
| » Nice to know I not just another sheep BAAA!!! |
|---|
The Expatriate
Achtung! You are 15% brainwashworthy, 18% antitolerant, and 33% blindly patriotic |
Congratulations! You are not susceptible to brainwashing, your values and cares extend beyond the borders of your own country, and your Blind Patriotism ("patriotism" for short) does not reach unhealthy levels. In Germany in the 30s, you would've left the country.
One bad scenario -- as I hypothetically project you back in time -- is that you just wouldn't have cared one way or the other about Nazism. Maybe politics don't interest you enough. But the fact that you took this test means they probably do. I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt.
Did you know that many of the smartest Germans departed prior to the beginning of World War II, because they knew some evil shit was brewing? Brain Drain. Many of them were scientists. It is very possible you could be one of them, depending on your age.
Conclusion: Born and raised in Germany in the early 1930's, you would not have been a Nazi. |
 |
My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
|
You scored higher than 4% on brainwashworthy |
|
You scored higher than 15% on antitolerant |
|
You scored higher than 45% on patriotic |
|
Jul. 25th, 2005 @ 01:21 pm
|
| » Well |
|---|
Your Summer Anthem is Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
Your summer will be marked by heartache - but mostly happiness. |
Jul. 15th, 2005 @ 05:57 pm
|
| » I am tired |
|---|
I am tired and I think I want to change schools because I don't think FAU is for me. I really don't like Boca all that much and I hate not having any transportation. I really independent and I don't like having to ask some one for a ride to go to the grocery store. I miss having a crew to hang out with and while I like living on my own I hate having new roomates every semester. The one's I have now really fucking suck right now. They are dirty and loud but I have to deal with them. I don't know if this is the right school for me I think maybe I should transfer to FIU and live at home which will save me money and I don't have to depend on any one to get around. I don't know I still up in the air. FAU was not my first choice and I think maybe I should have went with my gut instinct. If I had did that I would probably be either a FSU or NYU but like the coward I am I went the easy route. I'm thinking I should go to live in the resident halls on campus so I will have a meal plan and not havve to worry about going to the store for anything. Also the Dorms have computer labs so I don't have to worry about a computer anymore. I don't know we will see what happens in the Fall. Something has got to change or I am out of here.
Jul. 11th, 2005 @ 01:30 pm
|
| » quizzes for days |
|---|
The Keys to Your Heart
|
You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. |
In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored. |
You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change. |
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. |
Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. |
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. |
You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. |
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
| Your IQ Is 110 | 
Your Logical Intelligence is Average
Your Verbal Intelligence is Exceptional
Your Mathematical Intelligence is Above Average
Your General Knowledge is Genius |
You are dependable, popular, and observant.
Deep and thoughtful, you are prone to moodiness.
In fact, your emotions tend to influence everything you do.
You are unique, creative, and expressive.
You don't mind waving your freak flag every once and a while.
And lucky for you, most people find your weird ways charming! |
| Your Daddy Is Pedro Martinez |
What You Call Him: Dada
Why You Love Him: He takes you to Disneyland |
You Are 24 Years Old |
24
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.
|
Your Birthdate: May 4 |
Being born on the 4th day of the month should help make you a better manager and organizer.
You may be more responsible and self-disciplined than you realize.
Sincere and honest, you are a serious and hard working individual.
Your feelings are likely to seem somewhat repressed at times.
The number 4 has something of an inhibiting effect on your ability to show and express affections, as feeling are very closely regulated and controlled.
You are apt to be much more practical, rational, and conscious of details.
There is a good deal of rigidity and stubbornness associated with the number 4. |
You Are 45% Left Brained, 55% Right Brained |
The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.
Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.
If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.
Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.
The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.
Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.
If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.
Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.
|
Jun. 26th, 2005 @ 02:54 pm
|
| » Yeah That Me. |
|---|
| Your Taurus Drinking Style |
 You prefer to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full on zonk.
When you're truly intoxicated, you are a one-person stampede...
A bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers.
Your preference for wining and dining (or Bud and buddies) to body shots and barfing is quite fortunate for the rest of the world
This is not to say that you are by any means a teetotaler -- god, no.
You will get, er, gregarious (full of loudmouth soup, some would say) and are extremely amusing to drag to a karaoke bar when intoxicated. | | Your Signature Cocktails | | Early-to-bed Taureans need a picker-upper -- try a Red Bull and vodka. You likely have a leviathan sweet tooth and are fond of drinks with names that sound like dessert (50-50 bar, mudslide). Sweetly caffeinated drinks, like Irish coffee or white Russians, are ideal. A little more macho? Then go for something unpretentious, like a Jack and Coke or whiskey sour. | | Your Celebrity Drinking Buddies | | Billy Joel, Kelly Clarkson, Jerry Seinfeld, Uma Thurman, Renee Zellweger, Carmen Electra, Dennis Rodman, and The Rock. |
Jun. 26th, 2005 @ 02:45 pm
|
| » Intresting!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
|---|
Your Brain is 40.00% Female, 60.00% Male |
You have a total boy brain
Logical and detailed, you tend to look at the facts
And while your emotions do sway you sometimes...
You never like to get feelings too involved |
May. 4th, 2005 @ 05:02 pm
|
| » I knew it |
|---|
Apr. 24th, 2005 @ 11:41 pm
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
starita4's journal
